Here’s some of my thoughts from after camp. When I can articulate exactly what I’m feeling in writing, I feel better in general. It needs to be put down in writing. Planes are perfect places to write, (note to self) I should fly more often.
My reflections from camp. The camp was themed, “Because I’m strong” and as I return and write this, I feel that it was a most perfect and appropriate title. I wanna share something but how personal can I get?
How many people will read this who know me? I wanna be real and honest and as it gets.
LOL. Pray for me guys! So my healing will be complete. (James 5:16, read the whole verse).
High use of metaphor and allegory alert! The details are just too gory guys! I want y’all to be able to sleep at night! :p So there’s a veil on my story.
What happened was that on my way to camp, the devil showed up. No kidding! He arose in my flesh. My flesh is supposed to be dead but it awoke. He knew that I’d been roaming all this while and what was most lacking in my life. So he pulled out one of his favorite weapons- asking me to turn stones to bread. I’m like wait a minute, I’m on my way to camp, you can’t get me to fall into sin! But the temptation was strong. My flesh turned into my enemy and Satan’s accomplice. It refused to back down. It screamed at me to gratify it. I began to reason with sin. I picked up a book; I read a bit. I wondered at how I would be able to battle this time. I was on a plane and these demons were literally snakes slithering all over my body. It seemed like there was no way of escape. I found myself changing seats to be beside the window.
And at that moment, miraculously, it was as though my spirit and body changed seats of power and authority. My spirit moved to its rightful place, enthroned. I was looking beyond the window, and also beyond my sinful condition. I was looking at sunsets and clouds, which are said to be the dust of our Creator’s feet. And I was no longer paying attention to my flesh, formed from dust. The snakes had lost hold because I had entered a mindset of worship and thanksgiving. I was no longer begging God to deliver me, I was admiring His beauty and power. And from that position of praise, walls came down, victory was handed to me. My flesh was overshadowed. It was still weak but I wasn’t. I was strong.
For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: 23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? 25 I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.
Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
The opposite is true too. When we glorify God, our hearts are enlightened.
And this was how I overcame temptation. I went to camp feeling so grateful for grace that teaches us to deny ungodliness. I felt that God truly lived in me and that salvation really had appeared to all men. Self control might not be a miracle to you but it is to me. It doesn’t come to me naturally at all. But I’ve refused to accept myself as I am. All in all its a blessing to walk in the Spirit and I feel anointed just because of it.
At the moment when I’m laying on the floor at the camp grounds, I’m just thinking to myself how much more beautiful it is to seek Him than to seek my own. The worship at camp got so beautiful. It was such an overwhelming experience to be in His presence like that with no restraints on time or movement. Bless God. Another victory on my shelf. Another reason to have confidence in God. I’m strong.